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What role should an ex-friend play in you life?

October 1, 2009

We all have those not-so-good friends who walk out of our lives and then, at some later date, we are given the opportunity to let them back in. Do we take it?

This just happened to me. I had a friend who was generally considered a psycho by everyone I know. Okay, not everyone. But a lot of people. She was well known to completely and utterly crack the shits at people, throwing hissy fits and ignoring people for months if they didn’t agree with her opinion.

A couple of months ago we had what you might call a massive fight. It had been coming for awhile we were having disagreements on a large number of things and her drunken antics were pissing everyone off, especially when she became physically violent. It turned into a public slinging match after she dragged a mutual friend into an alley as if she were about to bash her up, and it ended with her saying ‘have a nice life’ and that she never wanted to see me again. I wasn’t that broken up about it, or surprised when she deleted me off facebook. I wasn’t even sure how I’d ended up friends with her in the first place and I don’t need those kind of drama queens in my life.

Anyway following the fight she disappeared overseas and I hadn’t heard a word from her. Then yesterday she re-added me on facebook and sent me an email saying ‘how are you? hope all is well’.

What the hell? How am I supposed to respond to that?

This girl completely cut me out of her life, just because we had a fight. And it’s not just me. Since then I have discovered a whole pool of her ex-friends who claim she just started completely barring them, often for trivial or no reasons. It’s likely she’s just going to cut me off again. The way she acted only proved I’m not as important to her as she was to me and that she gives very little thought to how her actions affect others. On the other hand, she was a major part of my life for so long. How can I not give her another chance? That seems unreasonable. Don’t I owe it to myself, if not her?

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