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What’s worse than a clingy girl? A clingy guy.

September 28, 2009

A few posts back (Just face it: he’s just not that into you) I introduced a female friend of mine who is ridiculously clingy and drives guys away with her more-than-strange behaviour and never-ending harrassment via phone calls. Well, I also have a (much closer) friend who is pretty much the opposite. When it comes to relationships she acts like the guy. She rarely gives out or takes phone numbers, never calls or texts back, and prefers to never again mention one night stands. To her everything is physical and the reason she acts like she does is usually boredom. Cue getting her tongue randomly pierced and flying to the beach without accommodation.

Anyway a while back she met a guy in a club, hooked up with him, and never replyed to any of his texts. She thought it was game over. About 2 weeks ago we ended back in the same club and she ended up back hooking up with him. That tends to happen after a while…there are no ‘new’ guys left. They’d been together about an hour when he demanded to know why she hadn’t texted her back that one time. He got pissed off when she couldn’t remember his name or profession. My friend wasn’t too bothered; she laughed it off, spent another hour with him and then went home.

Then the calls started. And the texts. Figuring maybe they’d stop if she texted back, she did. Big mistake. The texts and calls got increasingly possessive and my friend started to freak out. I started thinking he was a psycho-stalker and maybe we should call the police. My laidback friend told me not to worry; that he was a little too into her but that it would blow over. She stopped replying to his texts and stopped answering his calls and forgot about the situation. Somehow we ended up back at the same club Saturday night. And yes, he was there. Upon seeing her he was practically crying, saying how hurt he was that she was ignoring him. His friends announced all he’d been talking about was her and that they were a little weirded out by it. Amen to that!

While girls are sometimes expected to be clingy and somewhat desperate, guys are not. Girls get used to the fact that it takes them a few days to call (and that’s if they really really like you) and that they like the chase and that they are visual and physical and hey, we expect it. We like it. Well, I do. Frankly I’m not the kind of girl who requires a guy by her side 24/7. When you first meet someone new it’s exciting and fun and you want that feeling to last, not see them every day for 2 weeks until you’re sick of them. You can’t expect someone to become a massive part of your life right away. It takes time.

I don’t like any sorts of clingy people to be honest; girls or guys. No one should have to recieve 5 unanswered text messages in a row. No one should have to become paranoid about someone hanging around them all the time. No one should have to feel forced into committment with someone they’ve just met. Clingy people are annoying and infuriating. Girls are bad, but guys are worse. No one expects it from a guy.

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