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Just face it: he’s just not that into you

September 9, 2009

We all have that friend who’s completely hopeless around the opposite sex. Mine is one of those clingy, desperate girls that scares guys off faster than she can say ‘I love you’. Which, in her case, is usually about a week into the ‘relationship’. And I use the term ‘relationship’ loosely.

Everyone with half a brain knows that guys don’t like clingy girls. Hell, girls don’t like clingy guys. Half the fun of dating is in the thrill of the chase and if it isn’t at least a slight challenge we think it’s not worth it. You have to work for the things you want…right? Anyway the reason everyone enjoys the chase isn’t up for debate right now. The issue is why some girls act is clingy as…well…cling-wrap after one make-out session.

My friend is the sort who will do anything to get a guy to take her number, never listening to the advice of those who tell her that is a guy doesn’t ask for her number then he doesn’t want it. Often she gets his number as well, and in the hour after they meet has already sent four text messages and made two phone calls. And wonders why he hasn’t replyed. She searches for them on facebook, hunts them down at any place they mention they frequent (whether it be a pub, their place of work or their gym) and makes hundreds of calls in the space of a week. After a month she’s convinced they’re getting married and he is ‘the love of her life’. Actually it’s more like two weeks. Not surprisingly they don’t usually last a month.

I’ve heard these guys offer countless excuses over why they don’t want to date my friend. All the usual vague ones like ‘it’s not you it’s me’ and ‘it’s just not a good time’ as well as some real crackers. There was the one who said his mother was dying of cancer and he had to go take care of her. In Yemen (I suspect he may have taken this idea from the epiosode of Friends where Chandler runs from Janice pretending he’s going to Yemen). There was the one who said his ex dropped by and gave him head and he all of a sudden realised he was still into her. There was the one that told her he needed time to pursue his career, not girls. He worked at McDonalds. There were some that made it all about my friend. SHe was too fat, too short, too loud etc. There were some that just stopped calling.

To be fair, I don’t blame any of them. They never showed any genuine interest in my friend, other than maybe a hook-up. Maybe not even (on one occasion she got a guy’s number from a friend and started harassing him from there). I don’t think she even liked any of them a lot. But for whatever reason, my friend doesn’t seem to get the fundamental rules of dating. And she doesn’t get that sometimes










HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I mean, it’s a book and it’s a movie. Every female on the face of the planet should get it by now. Sometimes a guy just doesn’t like you. So what? There are plenty of guys that you don’t like! In fact, you probably don’t even like the guy that doesn’t like you all that much!

I’ve taken my friend to see this movie. Me, and numerous other friends have tried explaining to her that no matter how many times she calls a guy it’s not going to make him like her any more. In fact, it will probably just scare them off. No one likes people ringing them all the time. No one likes their inbox filled with messages and emails from just one person. There’s a reason stalking is a criminal offence. It scares people. But for whatever reason, she just doesn’t get it.

I guess everyone just laughs at the Gigi character in the movie until they actually meet one.

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